Wednesday, January 6, 2010

The Motherly Superpower to Relax and Stay Calm

When considering what to write as we enter 2010, I've been overwhelmed by the multitude of topics. It's as if when we enter a new year, I can't help but evaluate every aspect of my life, searching for ways to improve. Is this normal? Am I neurotic? Well even if I am, it cannot be helped. This is what I do.

As many, one area that I am particularly interested in right now is health. But that will be a topic to be addressed at http://seemammarun.blogspot.com

As this blog is titled Mamma Vintage, I think I will address my motherly resolution for the New Year . . .

To relax.

It seems that two guaranteed aspects of maternal life are guilt and the questioning of our own abilities in our role as mothers. Should I put him in preschool? Is he getting all of his nutrition? Should we vaccinate? Is he watching too much TV? How will he recall his childhood? Will he remember the wonderful memories I try to create for him or will he only recall the times I lost my temper?

Raising children is a very daunting task. Just think about it. You are raising children. Little people who are your entire responsibility to raise into healthy, happy, well-balanced, intelligent, moral adults. I can feel myself begin to panic if I just reflect on that too much.

So when the job description seems too demanding and above my limitations and skill level, I find refuge in these thoughts:

I am the perfect mother . . . for my children.

I was given my children for a reason. NO ONE could mother them better than I can. I know them better than anyone else in the world and Jason and I love them more than anyone else in the world.

And it is in the harbor of these comforting thoughts that I am more able to fulfill my potential as a mother. I stop doubting myself so much and I begin trusting my instincts more. With this confidence, I am more able to be creative in my parenting rather than be hindered by my own insecurities.

Am I a perfect mother? Of course not. But when I believe in my potential, I am much more effective.

There are definitely areas I need to improve in. I will confess, I yell too much. When I have one child who refuses to stop whining at me because he is sooo hungry and wants the meal that I am currently preparing NOW and decides to win over my attention by tackling the cat while another child needs to be bathed again because his hair is saturated with urine from playing with his privates while going to the bathroom and the bathroom that I just cleaned is now sprayed with his pee, yes, I might be inclined to yell. Weird, huh?

Nothing has taught me patience like motherhood. To try and stay calm during these times is freakishly difficult, requiring seemingly superpower strength.

On the other hand, on a frazzled day, I actually have had to tell myself repeatedly that there is no crying over spilled milk. Even if it is the fifth glass.

My best friend says I'm unflappable. This year I want to extend that trait over to motherhood.


Christmas Morning Hugs



Playing Together


Christmas Morning Kisses


An Amazing Father

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