I woke up this morning feeling so awful. Nausea and a headache - Are you kidding me? After yesterday which was a pretty awful day, this was very discouraging.
I stumbled into the kitchen and sat down. The day ahead seemed unconquerable. ALL I wanted to do was crawl back into bed.
I have been reading a book of devotions titled, "More Devotions for Homeschool Moms," by Jackie Wellwood. There is also a first book of devotions. These are the most down-to-earth, relatable, practical devotions I have ever read, although I admit that I have not read a lot of devotionals. These devotions would really be applicable to any mom. They are so refreshing.
Today's was titled, "I Think I Can."
I read it and was brought to tears. Yes, again. I'm pregnant, what can I say?
I prayed for God to give me the strength for today and to help me through it. All of the sudden, it occurred to me that maybe I should take Kahlua on a quick walk before Jason left for work, something I hadn't been planning on doing. I didn't really want to, but I knew it might help the way I was feeling.
The walk transformed the way I was feeling physically and my attitude. The cold, fresh morning air cleared away my headache and my nausea. The time by myself outside, reflecting, praying and observing the beautiful morning, gave me the energy and the will to take the day on.
Today has been a wonderful, productive day.
If it had been up to me, I would have given up at 7:00 in the morning. I would have stayed in my pajamas, done the absolute bare minimum and felt miserable all day.
Rather, I was able to teach the children, manage their bickering in a mostly constructive way, work out, make dinner, get through a mountain of laundry and have felt calm and joyful through most of it.
This is not my doing. This is all by the grace of God. Without Him, I can't do it. It is only with Him that I can move forward. When I forget this, I wallow and linger in my own frustration, fowl moods and inadequacy.
It is only with God that I can be who He calls me to be.